–Yes, this is still going on.  My contractor days, that were actually weeks—not really.  Those days are months!

I am the queen of change.  That is, no matter where I go, I am all about change.  There always has to be change.  How do I make this better?  How can I make things more efficient?  How can I save some time?  How can I save some money? And so on.

This is where my story begins and the COVID-19 (stay at home) Bathroom Remodel.

At some point, every person wants to do a DIY project.  We have all watched the shows and have figured out this is one way to save time and money.  And how hard can it really be if “Bob the Builder” can do it in 30 minutes.  (Sometimes these shows are more misleading than a sitcom resolution in an episode!) Not realizing that this is not a true picture of the time and money spent.  It will probably be more time and more money that what is seen on the TV.  Not to mention the emotional stress of trying to figure out how to do the project and the physical stress of actually doing the work.  They don’t portray that on TV!

Remodeling is not for wussies!  The project is already torn apart.  In my case it is the bathroom. Then there is a moment of panic.  You have started something and you are not sure how, what, and when you will finish. Oh my!  And you have ripped away the safe room, because it is the project being remodeled.

I have had a lot of time to think during this project.  The mud needs to dry.  The paint needs to dry.  The concrete needs to harden.  Etc., etc., etc. LOTS OF TIME!

This isn’t my first remodel project with my husband in our 23 years.  We have done this before—a few times.  Each time I try to figure out how we can make the project go faster.  Some of these ideas include making sure we have all supplies on hand before we start, taking vacation days to do a major concentration of the work, and me taking over the majority of the “family” responsibilities—so my husband is freed up to do the project.

We thought we had it in the bag with the COVID-19 stay home order.

NOT!

We still take multiple trips to the home improvement store—almost daily—for just the one item we forgot.  (It is a good thing these stores are considered “essential”.)

Come to find out, I had misunderstood what my husband would be doing while “working at home”.  After being home with all his women for a few days he chose to go outside of the house to work.  For his own sanity.

Clearly things are not going as I had envisioned.  My plan was corrupted.  No worries.  I was still thinking about how I could get the bathroom remodel back on track.  After all, change is what I do.

During all of my think time, I started making comparisons between this project (or any of the others) and my marriage.

This is what I came up with.

1. Just like the daily trips to the home improvement store. Great relationships take daily focus.  This can be done by finding time to connect with your spouse throughout the day.  Listening to them and doing things for them. This helps them to know they are “essential” in your life.
2. Much like the paint and mud that takes time to dry. Relationships take time to grow.  Me and my husband are two independent people.  We both continue to learn and have different experiences each day.  This means there is an opportunity for something new to be learned about him ongoing.  And YES, I am learning something all the time.
3. Getting out of the house or taking time away from each other (BUT not long periods of time like your remodeling project) is healthy for your relationship. Being away builds anticipation.  You come back refreshed and excited to share your adventures.  This can keep things interesting.

As always something can be learned from every experience we have.  Who would have thought watching paint dry would be so profound.

I’m curious!  What is something new you learned about your spouse during COVID-19?

Let’s talk about it.